Hong Kong divers take heed: the ocean is dark and full of terrors. Before you plunge in, know your enemy! For nothing would make these five beasts of the briny deep happier than to see you in a watery grave.
1. The Urchins of Death
These urchins appear to be waving their long spines around gently in an elegant ballet with the Chinese demoiselles. But don’t be fooled. In reality, they think evilly, they crawl evilly and they cluster together in evil packs to plan world domination. Dive in Hong Kong and see for yourself.
2. The Sly Scorpionfish
OK, so this particular specimen is more stupid than sly, pictured here in a patent camouflage fail. But apart from this guy, most of the local scorpionfish are so sly that you don’t notice them until you are just inches away from their cunning little faces. And just look at that expression and tell me that it isn’t diabolical.
(Unlike the other creatures in this post, a scorpionfish really could do you a serious injury, so be very aware of your surroundings and avoid touching anything!)
3. The Thunderbolt in the Night
Behold the blue swimmer crab. With his little upturned eyes on stalks, you’d think that butter wouldn’t melt in his
mouth mandibles. Oh how wrong you would be. This brute is actually over a foot long with claws extended and when it comes zooming at you on a night dive like a thunderbolt from hell, you will certainly know what hit you. Or not, if he succeeds. You have been warned.
4. The … Thing.
This one needs no explanation. Just look at that thing. It’s bigger than your head and IT’S COMING TO GET YOU!!!
5. The Evil Clown
Last but by no means least, here is the evillest creature of them all. This miniature orange monster has absolutely no sense of proportion when it comes to picking its opponent and many a local diver has perished under its unrelenting attack. Forget five-metre tiger sharks. Forget malicious triggerfish. If you fear only one creature in the ocean, you would do well to fear the clown!
Have you ever come face to face with any of these malevolent critters in Hong Kong? Did you survive? Do you have others to suggest? Let me know!
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